Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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