Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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