just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
