you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
