I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
