do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
