I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Randomize
