I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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