Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
