Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
