You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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