In the future we'll all be gay
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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