Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
