I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
