Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
