fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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