i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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