'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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