You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
it wasn't lemon gatorade
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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