If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He? As in you personified your dick?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
