my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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