I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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