Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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