its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
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