i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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