Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
