I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
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