Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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