I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
