this beer tastes like vomit already
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
