His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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