his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
