I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You made out with two different species that night
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
