is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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