oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Randomize
