So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize