As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
