I can't breathe out the right side of my face
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I just googled if crying burns calories
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
