i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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