His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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