Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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