just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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