You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
