how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Randomize
