There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
