It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
