I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
