I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
