It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
