And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Floor bacon is actually really good
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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